Invasive Frosh Infest Kingston – Native Species Affected

As summer winds down, Kingston yet again has the conditions required to draw large amounts of invasive frosh to it’s bountiful plains. When the ground temperatures reach 22 degrees celsius in the month of September the 18 year old frosh of broods ‘Year 24’ and ‘Year 25’ will emerge into Kingston, in a fashion very similar to the brooded cicadas. Although cicadas are considered natural, frosh are not. Their introduction to the ecosystem is very destructive to the environment, especially in this perfect storm scenario. 

Due to a disease outbreak in the ecosystem, we have had two years since a frosh outbreak has come to campus. As the disease outbreak lowers in intensity, we will have twice the amount of effective frosh on campus, which will certainly be negatively affecting the species of upper years, grad students, and townies the like. What would, in a typical year, be an influx of second years has now turned into one year of frosh and another year of second year frosh. You will see hundreds if not thousands of critters wandering campus in hopes of finding their required buildings, many of whom will never make it. There may be no solace until the warm weather drives them into hibernation yet again next summer.

Upper years and grad students, an already endangered species from the Kingston area, expected to be completely driven away by 2023, will be the first to be affected by this influx of the invasive frosh. These invasive frosh have an incredible affinity for buying hundreds of dollars of useless textbooks, something that upper years will not be able to keep up with. This competition will decimate the supply of textbooks as these frosh will purchase any textbook that is even merely suggested to them, leaving nothing left for the upper years and grad students, who will soon face extinction.

The townies, a currently thriving species who are in no danger of extinction, will also be incredibly negatively affected. This influx of frosh will undoubtedly spread disease and viruses to the recovering townies. Furthermore, while the frosh may seem to be helping the townies through economic stimulation, the townies will undoubtedly form a reliance on their support, and much like leaving a raccoon who you feed garbage every night, when the frosh leave, the townies will starve.

While frosh leaving in the summer may sound like a good thing, and it is, the worst is yet to come. The frosh are expected to nest and breed rapidly without any form of protection in massive nests such as Victoria Hall and Chown, exacerbating the problem. Please be advised not to make physical contact with these frosh as it may put you at risk of invasive diseases, frosh-flu and even frosh-stank. Please do what you can to keep yourself and others safe by avoiding all frosh in the coming months, as not only are they disgusting, they are also dangerous.